1 month left for the final..will i screw it up? i doubt myself..after all the chaos i had for the past month..i wonder if i could get through..i'm saddened by the episodes i've seen..i'm frustrated by the action taken..i wanted to cry, sobbed till it drenched the life in me..i am disappointed with the hand that i've finally hold on to again..forgive me for saying this, i should have never doubt you, i should never blame you..it is me, myself at fault..although the small dark voice in me asying, how could you let me go? how could u make me lost again? but no, my concious embraced me and made me realised it's my doing..i missed and longed for that warmth and blessing touch of yours..i've begin to forget how it's really feels. the touch that would make me cry instantly; i would forget all my sorrow and sins..the blessing that wrapped my fragile soul, so it would always be protected by you. the one and only you..i wish i could sing like the bird, in her happiness or in her sadness; her chirpped and twittered still provide solace..i wish i could shine like the sun, even if she's millions miles away, her ardors can still reach the earth. oh how i wish i could turned back time and live without regret..how i wish i could regained your hand once more and would never let it go..not even a second..not even till i permanently closed my eyes..grant me that certainty..