is what i'm feeling right now..looking back at wat i've been doing for these 6 months..i cant stop destroying my own self...i procrastinate many many many times...i can't forgive myself for this...i wanted a short break, for me to breathe..but it won't move on after i take that break..it feels as if i'm stuck in a pit without a way out...seriously i'm tired..tired of this ongoing journey that i don't know the real destination..i guess i'm not ready yet to do this..i know i'll be wasting my years..but what's going on right now..what my eyes see, my ears hear, my heart rejecting every bit of it..i don't know whats wrong with me..i sit n sit..praying n asking for guidance...ya Allah, show me the right path...i'm lost in confusion so please help me lord..i wanna act right but can't play my cards right...don't let me go astray show me the right path of what should i really do..i do not know anymore if my choice or anyone's choice are the right one...sure, life is hard...if i can't stand just this much how would i survive after this? perhaps they are lots for me to learn n perhaps i set my wings free too early...show me the way...maybe i've lost the hand that had been guiding me all these years..Astaghfirullah-al'azim...