hey you..it'll take time..NO months or years for me to erase what u've said to me that day..i will never ever forget every single words that came out of ur mouth..not even a period..u've gone too far..too much for me to even face u, or even talk to u..the wound u made is the deepest of them all..u destroyed my happiness, u made my life miserable..u forced me to hate u..i am no longer a little girl u seen in me..i've grown, n i'm beginning to see the dark part of everyone..one by one betrayed me..one by one showed their hypocrisy..that include u, the pure stinking heart hypocrite..no motter how much i detest u, no matter how many curses i said in my heart..but i could never abjure the place u was once in my heart...never..becuz, u was one of the person i love..but now it's loved...so you, my fragile heart cannot withstand seeing u yet..
don't be angry at me cuz u stepped on the mine urself..


as for him, forever in my life i could never hate him..no matter how many tears i cried cuz of him..do u wanna know why? becuz he's the one that i fall in love with since i know how to breathe..no one can replace him..irreplaceable..i would never fall for another man without the slightest 'warmth' i feel when i am with him..as for her, she's my angel..the one i love the most in this world..she taught me the meaning of love and affection from the very moment my heart started to beat..it was the most difficult moment for me to not see them and say 'i'm home' everyday anymore..but i've got to learn n i did..i missed her every day, i cried every night..i wanted to always be near her, to see her pretty face again..to tease each other n hug her when i'm sad..i miss his gentle smile and warm hands..patting me on the head..the open talks we always had..the invention we always did together..even if my nail broke or my hand scratched i wouldn't complaint..because it made me happy..happy to be with both of you...then i realised, my life was so carefree...i started to listen to more and more bad things..more and more agony..seeing her cries, over and over again..seeing his heartbroken and worried face, so many many times..i opened up my eyes, to see through the invincible blindfold that kept blocking my view...
then..him and her..changed...i couldnt find that person i had known for all these years anymore..the've changed..it was like chasing them and screaming their names outloud..but they never turned to face me..they kept on walking away, so fast that i couldnt catch up.. day to day, i gave up on that..my feet were numb from all the running and searching..i pretended to be alright and accepted the fact that the old them had gone...for so many times, u're being unfair towards me..i was raised to be truthful and just..time to time..myself starting to rebel..to loosen this uneasiness and mask i've been wearing for many years..u said i've changed, but who was the one that changed at the first place..it wasnt me..u told me once 'when in Rome, do as the Romans do'..n i did..i wrote this in red cuz i know this is his favourite colour..the same as mine..

after all those theatrical acts ended..the curtain falls and i unmasked myself..i have no intentions whatsoever to hurt him or her...i was so happy to share with her about my stories..but the happiness was shattered by you..you ruined it all!!! you made them hate my other half!!!! they haven't met this individual yet!! u blinded their eyes, u poison their thought...i've found a slight warmth of his in this individual...i feel the comfort of hers in this individual...when u ask what i see n wanted so much from this individual...only one word can sum it up.. 'happiness'..that's all..i could smile sincerely..i could flaps my wing freely..n yet u still forcefully taking away that one happiness i have left...bare in ur mind that..i am different, very different...until u can accept the real me, then i will face u again...all of my life, even though all of you made him and her sad, all of u hurt them to the core...i never ever say that cursing line..never in this 2 decades of my life i mention those words.. the same blood running in our veins..but you, simply said those words..for so many occurances i heard you saying those words...n now, u said that right to my face...do u think i will swallow that? i will make it happen, i will make u feel of what u wished for..i will..
hey you..have a happy life..